For a woman who experiences the pain of infertility, Mother's Day can be a pretty sad occasion. Instead of counting years I have been trying to conceive I count how many Mother's Days I have gone childless...if you count the years I tried with my ex-husband I am on 14 now. That includes the years that I was single, cause although I was single I still longed for that child and grieved for the children that I didn't have with my ex.
Yesterday was overall a pretty good day, if you don't count that fact that I got wished Happy Mother's Day by people in my own family who know I'm not a mom. Maybe they did it because I am a Step-mom. Who knows. My mother always acknowledges me on Mother's Day but she always has to add the "Step" in the card....I guess to make me feel better.When my mother-in-law was alive she always wished my Happy Mother's day but would say...Because you are a second mom to "B", my stepson. I only had one stranger wish me a Happy Mother's Day and that was in a restaurant on Friday....so I lucked up there. I hate it when people just assume you are a mother! I skipped church yesterday because of the usually Mother's Day stuff and all the kids there with their moms. Just couldn't take it this year. I did however read several great wishes from friends online this year that have been where I am now, but were celebrating their first Mother's Day. They made sure and acknowledged those of us still waiting for our little miracles. One day (sigh).... My hubby, for the second year in a row has bought me a single rose...this year it was a red one. He doesn't wish me a Happy Mother's Day, he just gives it to me and tells me that he loves me. That is all I need and I feel better, because I think he finally understands what I go through emotionally.
So brings me to the sad part of Mother's Day. I have a High School friend who is losing her battle with Metastatic Triple Negative Breast Cancer. On Saturday, Mother's Day Eve, an organization called "Let There Be Mom" came to Birmingham, Alabama (where Robyn lives) from South Carolina. They help families preserve the memory of a parent who is losing their battle to a disease. They spent the whole day with the family, and although I do not know what they did, I'm sure they did a great job and there will be much for her two young daughters to hold on to as they grow up with their mom in Heaven. Anyway, yesterday, which was Mother's Day, should have been a happy time for the family. Spending what might be Robyn's last Mother's Day together, however she had to taken to the hospital and was admitted. As of this morning the family was told that is was only a matter of days before she closes her eyes one final time. Next year the girls will not have their mommy to celebrate with...but they will have their grandmother. Robyn's mother was with her yesterday, for that I am thankful. As a mother, I'm glad Ms. S has a final Mother's Day memory with her only daughter, although it isn't a very happy memory...at least they were together. So as I have been contemplating Mother's Day and all it encompasses, I think things could be worse. I cannot imagine what my friend and her family are going through right now, and feel somewhat selfish that I had my "Oh Woe Is Me Pity Party" yesterday. I thankfully still have my mom and she still has me. So if you are reading this, take the time to Thank our Father above for the time you have with your mom and if you are a mom with your children. Never let anyone doubt what you felt about them. And if you are feeling really down and low about something going on in your life, just remember there are worse thing out there happening to people who really don't deserve it.
Please pray for my friend Robyn, her husband, her two young daughters, her mother, her brothers and all of her other family and friends as they say goodbye and watch another ANGEL get her WINGS! We love you Robyn! Because I knew you....I have been changed for Good! Thanks for letting me call you my friend.